I have watched two amazing women be methodically crushed by two monstrous men for the past few years and it's been unbearable to see how our legal system does absolutely nothing to set things right. These women have tried to escape, but the courts have made that impossible. I am so angry, so frustrated at my lack of ability to help them break free. These selfish, cruel and vindictive men have been rewarded over and over again while the women they continue to abuse have been punished. No matter how many lies they tell, how many lives they ruin, they continue to abuse, control and crush with a complete and total disregard for the destruction of their relationships not only with the women they've abused, but with the family that surround them. That is the psyche of an abuser.
The wheels of karma have not yet spun in their direction, but it is my sincere hope that soon they will and with an unrelenting velocity.
I wonder sometimes how these men can stand to even look at themselves in the mirror. I suppose trying to understand a sociopath is pointless. I wonder if the possessions and the money they covet like Gollum or Scrooge give them any satisfaction at all. I wonder what it feels like to know that your egomaniacal unbridled selfishness and unrelenting need to 'win' has completely destroyed your relationships with your children, your grandchildren and everyone who should have mattered to you.
You'd think, eventually, somehow, someday, when they sit alone in their dragon cave surrounded by their crappy dragon hoard that whatever tiny heart they might actually possess will crack open. And then, finally, they'll know how much they've lost and how little they've gained.
If there is justice, they will find the prison they've constructed so carefully for themselves is locked so completely, they will never be able to escape.
"I wear the chain I forged in life. I made it link by link and yard by yard. I gartered it on of my own free will and by my own free will, I wore it." Jacob Marley from A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens
"They’re thieves. They’re thieves, they’re filthy little thieves. Where is it? Where is it? They stole it from us. My Precious. Curse them, we hates them! It’s ours it is, and we wants it. "
Gollum from The Lord of the Rings by J.R. Tolkien
"Until you do right by me, everything you THINK about is gonna crumble!" Ceelie to Albert from The Color Purple by Alice Walker (thanks to Andrea Ferguson)
Love
Madge
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3 comments:
Justice often vacations with truth and honor, somewhere hidden and not available to the majority of us who are women. It is horrible, it is sad, and it is a disgrace to our society... We who fight for the rights of women all across the world seem to forget those who are right here. But, isn't that so often the case, we miss the forest for the tree.
I know that I might end up sounding stupid here. I was married to a verbally abusive man until I could take it no longer. I stayed too long as it was. And I am going to assume (thought I hate doing that b.c I don't like doing that) that the only way the legal system could continually crush these women is that they try to leave and that the men are somehow siding with the men and there are children involved. And somehow these men have stacked the deck that they would get custody of the kids. Otherwise, there is no good reason not to divorce them and take your kids out of that environment. That being said, there are organziations that will help abused women and children escape these situations. Change your name and help you go underground. Have either of these women thought about doing that? When the justice system stops working, that is the time to start using other channels.
Robin
I can't discuss the details of either situation. Both women have
left in the physical sense. The abuse they're now receiving is all about finances and control. One can't get a divorce finalized due to constant manipulation of the legal system and the other can't get on with her life after a divorce. Suffice it to say, each situation is complicated in ways most of us around them can't even begin to fathom.
It is maddening to stand by and watch these situations continue on and these amazing women continue to be emotionally and financially abused.
Best
Margot
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